Finding Peace with Mental Health Challenges Through Grieving and Grace
An encouragement from Ch. 11 from our FREE Living Grace and Ch. 7 in Family Grace workbooks (personal or groups), "Grieving and Grace."
Grieving is normal to the healing process and new meaning of life
If Jesus grieved, we can too
Lamenting is part of resilience, God’s silent presence
Grieving is a normal part of the mental health journey, for both the individual and family.
Mental health challenges for both the individual and their family or spouse can come with some feelings of loss ... and grieving is healing.
Loss because of mental health challenges for the individual can bring about a loss of identity, purpose, and even relationships. For the spouse and family, it can mean the loss of what they dreamed of having with their loved one ... it hurts when life is interrupted by these types of losses.
It's a form of lamenting ... which is normal in the Bible. It's a form of healing, moving into a new depth of life. It’s not so much trying to get over it, but what we learn from it and how it creates a new meaning of life (with that loss).
A lot of the time, grieving is not summed up in "three things you learned," rather healthy grieving is learning to acknowledge the loss (yeah, it's emotional, too!) and new meaning unfolds over time.
There's a great quote from a new friend I met this year and did a webinar with him, Dr. Bill Hoy, he's a Baylor University clinical professor of medical humanities ... he says,
“Grief is at its heart, a bridge between the world that used to be and the world that is going to be ... it’s rediscovering who I am in light of the loss ... who am I now! Loss doesn’t ruin us, but it does change us.”
Jesus modeled grief, so we can too.
In the West, we have less understanding and cultural rhythms of how to lament, mourn, and grieve. Without the wisdom to move in, through, and with grief, we can get stuck.
To help with this growth journey, in our Living and Family Grace workbooks, we describe grief's different motions and the grace purpose of each one.
We use the story of Jesus mourning John the Baptist's death (Matt. 14:6-14), but you can even add when Jesus laments Lazarus' death (John 11:33-36). Jesus is and shows what God is like ... where God makes space to lament and reveals love ...
"... being deeply moved in spirit and was troubled ... Jesus wept ... the Jews were saying, 'see how He loved him'" (John 11:33-36).
Grieving is a form of love and grace to grow from loss. In the last motion of grieving and grace in the workbooks, we express ...
"We develop a new resilient strength when we've grieved through our pain. We are now able to acknowledge our loss and/or new circumstances and accept how this impacts our lives. We have a new sense of empathy to give compassion and support to others."
As we move through the mental health experience, I know some losses are harder than others … and God is weeping, lamenting with us through each one.
Why?
Because distance from His children is a foreign and false concept to God. If you feel God is silent, maybe He’s just respecting, and feeling what you feel … there are just no words, just presence.
Joe Padilla | Grace Alliance
